I am reading again, Joyce Meyer’s Battlefield of the Mind. I must admit, though I don’t agree with her teachings on salvation, her work has been extraordinarily helpful to me in my time of need. In her book, she talks about how our thought life is the epicenter of all that we do, think, act, and believe. If Satan has control over our thoughts, by planting in them little inceptions of doubts and fears we become slaves to negative thinking.
I must admit. I have not really liked who I have become lately ever since the beginning of my last semester, I feel like I have been led around by my frustrations, fears, and resentment. Without the support of a strong church family or a clear vision for my future, I have wandered aimlessly about. I have become discouraged with the friends in my life, they not being a strong source of Christian fellowship, but a source of cynicism and hopelessness and selfishness. I feel like I have become too much like that. I feel so lonely for strong Christian friends.I feel so lonely for people who are strong, who encourage us toward God, who are able to feel joy and hope. I feel lonely for strong Christian adults who I can respect, who are guides for my life, and supporters of my ambitions. And without this in my life, it can make me very envious of those who seem to be blessed with what I so desperately desire.
With much prayer, I am trying to dig myself out of this pit of hopelessness I have managed to fall into…again. I realize, God can do everything in his power to cheer me on, but in the end, it is up to me to be strong enough, brave enough, and motivated enough to believe, to have faith, and to be courageous enough to hope again.
In the book I am reading, Joyce Meyer gives us an example of a positive prayer. I hope to adopt this model and with God’s help, someday, I hope it stays within my heart:
” I am really sad this has happened, but I am going to trust God. I hope [insert concern] will/will not happen. But more than anything I want God’s perfect will. If things don’t turn out the way I want them to I will survive because Jesus lives in me. It may be hard for a while, but I trust the Lord. I believe that in the end everything will work out for the best.”
Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!
~Is 30:18
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline,
~ II Tim 1:7
