My Kind of Man
October 21st, 2008
So there is this guy… Yes, often times this statement has been declared by many a young girl happening upon the fortuitous occasion to meet that heart stealing, amazingly aggravating, wonderfully wretched, irresistible creature known as man. One of two things usually arises after such a discovery. One: they like each other; or two: they don’t like each other. I know, I know, I don’t mean to come across somewhat cursory and cynical with such a colorless summary as that. There are a myriad of endings that may arise from the typical boy-meets-girl story. However, since this is my little essay and I am in control of what goes on around here, we will only discuss one type of story. And it is my story, or rather yet, it is how I analyze my relationships.
For me I have found that somewhat different tools of analysis are used when I survey the choice of men before me. One test in particular has always and been a foundational tool of young-man-assessment… Whenever I meet a young man to whom I am considering giving my heart and soul, I always give him a quirky, secret, little test which will most usually inform me instantly whether or not this relationship has a chance to develop into anything worthwhile.
It all happens at church. We sit down. He looks so sharp in his Sunday best: his dark blue, crisp dress shirt. There is a subtle yet strongly welcomed scent of cologne alluring me into thoughts probably best left for a more appropriate time in my life. I watch him as he so affably chats with those around him; putting them at ease and brightening their mornings by his friendly, genuine interest. That is nice and very endearing to my naturally shy deportment, but I am not fully won over.
Church begins. He reads his bulletin and as he does I notice him surreptitiously readjusting himself so he might feel more comfortable on the hard, wooden pews…yet, conveniently as he does this the empty gulf between us is subtly lessened. I am flattered and again drawn away by that enticing smell of a guy, but still, I am not impressed. We begin to sing. All at once, my passionate heart is enveloped with the melodious and commanding voice beside me. He has the voice of an angel. Would a man know that such a gift as a beautiful voice can melt instantly any girl’s resolve to stray from his arms? How a girl’s heart would swell with sweet adoration and devoted delight toward the man who woos her with the rushing, powerful spell of his song? I listen, almost enchanted; yet still, I am not impressed. The Lord’s Supper. A time of somber recollection of God’s great and terrible sacrifice that forever has emblazoned hope into the hearts of those who seek Heaven as an eternal resting place. Inconspicuously, I glance at the young man beside me. His head is bowed in solemn prayer, his shoulders bowed in reverential repose. What a beautiful picture, I think as I flip open my Bible to Matthew preparing myself for my own thoughts of Calvary. But still… it is not totally what I am looking for…
And then it comes. The moment I have been waiting for all service… the moment that will consummate all my wonderings, hopes, thoughts, and estimations of this young man. He reaches for his Bible. He opens it and flips to the announced passage… I discreetly watch him… Matthew, Romans, I Thessalonians, James… I stare… The pages are bright and crisp, no markings taint the soft, creamy pages. No ink, nor pencil permeates the black, immortal words of the God . Nothing… I frown slightly and sigh. This beautiful young man looks at me and dons a half curious, half welcoming smile. I smile deferentially and turn back to my own Bible.
Perhaps he has a new Bible. It certainly looks new.
Perhaps he makes notes in a separate notebook. Yet, I do not see one.
Perhaps he has another Bible at home which he uses for study. This certainly may be a possibility.
Perhaps… perhaps not…
Like some kind of memorized dance, he obediently copy his notes down, dutifully flips to the corresponding verses, and attentively receives every word that the speaker has to offer. I begin to wonder: his appearance is worshiping God, but is his heart?
I don’t know about you, but when I am in class, one in which I hope to excel within, I always take time to study my textbook. I scratch out notes here or there, I underline an interesting passage, I write references, notes, random thoughts upon the pages… I need to make notes, I need to highlight, I need to scribble. So when studying my Bible the pages there are equally marked up. My Bible is falling apart; the soft white pages are now a dull ivory color, the gold lining on the edges has long since faded; the little flappy thing behind the front and back cover is starting to peel away. There is something written or underlined on almost every page of the New Testament. I think I have highlighted everything in I Timothy. To tell you the truth, my Bible looks as if it has been thrown down the stairs, left outside, or captured by a two year old with a marker… it is tired, worn out and in need of a little restoration. But to me it is a beautiful thing.
What can be more beautiful than a worn out, feebly bound, ragged Bible? Unless you are using God’s word for a door mat or have accidentally put it in the washing machine, then most likely your Bible has been an old, familiar friend. A guide, a listener, a comforter, a teacher; a faithful companion in days of despair and a pristine fountain of wisdom, knowledge, and instruction.
To me, (though not necessarily applicable to all situations) the more a Bible appears to be used the stronger a person is in Christ. The more they will have read, the more they will understand, the more they understand, the more mature they will be in the faith and “…grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ…” (1 Peter 3:18). When I see a person who has obviously been studying their Bible, my heart will burst with delight and unequivocal joy. What a beautiful sight! A soul enraptured in the word of God is nearer to His heart than any other… and to mine as well. There is nothing on this earth that would bring me more delight and true happiness than to find a man whose heart is so lost in God’s word that it is through Him that we meet.
So the service ends. The handsome, charming, very clean, nice smelling young man beside me graciously escorts me from auditorium. Yes, he is handsome and tall and dark. Yes, he is slender and strong. Yes, he smells good, yes he is a good pew sitter… but his Bible looks completely untouched. I may give him the benefit of the doubt and assume that he has at home another, more utilized Bible… Sometimes I wonder if he is out there at all…Surely so. If indeed I am to marry why would God give me anyone less than a strong, faithful servant of His? A man who will put God before the cares of this world; a man who will not sell out to the temptation of conformity and become just another “Sunday morning Christian” Are you out there? I want to accomplish great and wonderful things for God… even if those great things are as seemingly insignificant as helping just one person…or merely shining as a steady, Christian example. Who will help me when I am discouraged? Who will keep me on task, encouraged, and motivated to study God’s word everyday and seek to rightly understand what the Bible tells us to do?
Many girls profess that their one true wish is to be united with a great, Christian man. But how many of those promises are imbued with deep and faithful conviction? Such a conviction that if indeed it became obvious that no such man is currently present within her life, that a girl is to wait… forever, if need be? I don’t know about you, but that is a tough contract to sign.
If God wants me to remain alone I have no choice but to follow…I am just praying that God has in mind a different future. A future that includes that man… the man who will above all help me stay strong in the faith, a man who will work as my equal in spreading God’s truth, a man that will be my friend and companion on the walk to salvation, a man that treasures God’s words above anything else in his life… this is my kind of guy… the perfect, amazing, wonderful, most incredible kind of guy I could ever imagine… the man with the highlighted Bible.
